Day 19

The Lar Lubovitch Experience has come to a close. What an amazing three weeks spent in a small town with big people. I have met so many extraordinary people and made a lot a great friends that I hope to never lose. It's amazing what three weeks can do to you...

It was very emotional for me today. We had our final Yoga class with Nicole and then had a modern class with Jason. His class was very Graham. It was a great class, I only wish Jason could have taught us more. He told us that he was one of the founders of Battleworks by Robert Battle! No wonder he is such an exquisite dancer, Robert Battle was his colleague!

Then we had lunch, an hour rehearsal and then the show. Kate and Brian showed 3/4 of Fandango, the duet we had been learning in partnering class with Sylvan. It was beautiful! It definitely is a challenging duet...and we only learned 2:00 of the 15:00 minute solo!! Then the show started. We saw Nicole, Reid/Jenna, and Chris's pieces go, and then Jojo's....and it was kind of a disaster. Not only did my skirt fall off, but the timing was completely off and everyone's timing with the music created a sloppy canon. I was not pleased...but then we all talked to everyone and no one really noticed. Because the piece was so dramatic and theatrical, people weren't especially invested in the specific details.

I talked to Jonathan afterwards and explained to him how frustrated I was with my performance. He said that given the circumstances, we did the best we could have! Our rehearsals were perfect too! That is what sucks! This is why Ms. E always told us it's good to have a bad dress rehearsal and bad luck to have a successful one! Anyways, I was talking with Jojo after and I shared to him my frustration of the future. His response was to not be discouraged and that everyone has those days where you wonder if you should even be in this career path..but he encouraged me to go forth and continue to work hard. He said, "Be the diva that you already are but are afraid of being." This was definitely a boost for me. Shoutout to Jojo to helping me through this process! I feel as though he's been there with me since Day 1, making me feel like I belong in this business. And although it seems silly, it really helped me gain my confidence. While everyone was telling everyone else how beautiful they were I felt as though I was not noticed. But even for a split second, Jojo noticed me and my hard work and it felt great to be appreciated by someone. I will continue to work my hardest and try to grasp my inner diva however, without the help of others but by simply trusting myself.

I have learned so much about myself in this journey, and it would have not been possible without my parents. Without their hard work and their dedication to me and my successes, I would not have come so far. I am living my dream right now, I am hoping that all this hard work pays off and allows me success in the future, but I have so much to be thankful for. If my journey in dance must end to tomorrow, at least I can say that I had a great experience and that I had supportive parents to back me up.

Thank you to everyone who made this experience worthwhile. I will miss my Skidmore/Saratoga/Lubovitch friends, but have no doubt I will see them all again. For now, adios!